Fertility Journey

Merry Christmas

Wishing each of you a VERY Merry Christmas. May you find comfort and joy in the time spent with your family. Cherish every moment together, and hug your little ones a little tighter. Be encouraged by their excitement Christmas morning while waiting to open their presents. Be PRESENT in each moment – capture the love and joy in your memories.

Prayers for our hearts and emotions right now would be a blessing. This will be our last family Christmas (on Shelly’s side) without aneice/nephew – bitter sweet the reminder of my brother and sister-in-law expecting a little one. Joyous for them, but my heart aches deeper – an active reminder of our vacancy. Many have asked how we’re doing with it – and I truly don’t have a way to describe the juxtaposition of joy and saddness.

I pray for each of you who have reached out to me to share your struggle of infertility. I love you, and we WILL get through this. Thankful to lean on others when we need encouragement and to know you’re not in this alone as a couple – but we don’t wish this heartache on anyone. You are in our hearts!

* Photo: Shelly and Santa Jake! He’s a good sport each year at the Chiropractic office I work at – what a joy to see him with each of the children (and adults). *

Fertility Journey

Christmas Lights

What a blessing Christmas lights are this time of year. Brightening the darkness in our physical life – as well as the darkness in our depression, hurt, and pain.
I often find myself taking side roads and detours just to find a new home with lights. Why? Because it brightens my soul – they are beautiful, unique, and remind me of Jesus in my life. He brightens every part of me. He truly is what gets me through each day – I am thankful and blessed to KNOW Him! I often wonder how I could possibly get through this season of life without Him, and without Jake as such a wonderful support.

A little over a week ago, Jake and I put up our outside Christmas lights. Are they perfect? Absolutely not. Are they fun? You bet! We rushed around to put them up in time so our friends could drive by with their three sweet little ones to see them before bedtime. I sent photos of the process (Jake on the ladder in the tree, both of us on the roof, and our indoor lights) to their mom to share with them – apparently we were the talk of their dinner (especially Jake for their eldest daughter, Elsie… I don’t blame her, he’s pretty awesome – and cute!) When they stopped by, we walked outside to greet them. I could not let them drive by without seeing them! Miss Elsie’s response to our decor – “Jake did an AMAAAAAZING job!” What a beautiful soul- she does my heart good!

The past few days I have stopped to take photos of these beautiful homes – not for myself, but for the children. Their joy and excitement with seeing all these fun lights is so beautiful. Some days it’s a painful reminder of our absence of children – I so desperately want to be able to drive around and share in the excitement with OUR children, but for now I will bless other’s children with the photos/moments and use this time as an opportunity to reflect on Jesus.